"Wives, submit to your own husbands, as is fitting in the Lord. Husbands, love your wives and do not be bitter toward them." - Colossians 3:18-19
Reflection
Colossians 3:18-19 is part of Paul’s broader teaching on Christian living, emphasizing relationships that reflect Christ’s love and order. In this passage, he addresses husbands and wives, providing foundational instructions for a God-honoring marriage. While these verses have sometimes been misunderstood, their true meaning points to mutual respect, love, and harmony within the covenant of marriage.
Paul first instructs wives to submit to their husbands "as is fitting in the Lord." This submission is not about inferiority or control—it is about willingly embracing God’s design for marriage. Biblical submission is rooted in trust, humility, and love. It reflects the way the church submits to Christ, not out of fear, but out of devotion and faith.
Likewise, husbands are commanded to love their wives and to avoid bitterness. The love Paul speaks of is not passive or conditional—it is the sacrificial love demonstrated by Christ Himself. It is a love that seeks to serve, cherish, and protect. A husband who truly loves his wife with Christ-like devotion will lead with gentleness, understanding, and selflessness.
When both spouses commit to living out their respective roles with the heart of Christ, marriage becomes a reflection of God’s divine love. Submission is balanced by love, and love is strengthened by honor. Neither partner is meant to dominate or belittle the other; rather, both are called to uplift, protect, and serve one another as they grow together in faith.
Personal Application
This passage challenges married couples to examine how their relationship mirrors the love of Christ. Do husbands love their wives with the same devotion Christ has for His church? Do wives embrace a posture of trust and respect, recognizing the beauty of God’s design?
For wives, submission does not mean blind obedience or passivity—it means choosing to honor and support their husbands in a way that strengthens the marriage and fosters unity. It means rejecting the world’s negative interpretations and embracing the biblical call to partnership, knowing that a marriage rooted in Christ flourishes.
For husbands, loving their wives as Christ loves the church is a high calling. It requires patience, kindness, and a heart that seeks to serve rather than dominate. It means speaking words of encouragement rather than criticism, cultivating a relationship built on trust and emotional safety, and making sacrifices for the good of their spouse.
Beyond marriage, this passage reminds all believers that relationships should reflect Christ’s love and humility. Whether in friendships, families, or community, treating others with respect, serving with compassion, and loving selflessly are ways to embody the truth of God’s Word.
Prayer
Heavenly Father, thank You for the gift of marriage and for the wisdom You provide in Your Word. Help husbands and wives to live in love, honor, and unity, reflecting Your perfect design. Teach us to embrace our roles with humility and to serve one another selflessly. May our relationships be strengthened by Your truth, filled with patience, kindness, and Christ-like devotion. For those who are not married, guide them to cultivate relationships that mirror Your love and grace. Let all we do bring glory to You. In Jesus’ name, Amen.
Written by Sarah Leasure
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